Lack of TTC Posts Lately

I’ve been doing a crappy job in general lately with posting somewhat regularly on here, but I have been super avoiding TTC/baby-related posts. The reason for this is two-fold. First of all - there isn’t much to report. We’re still trying, and we’re still not having any success because nothing is going on (by that I mean I am on cycle day 128 … not good - and yes, I’ve tested, like 3 times. All negative, so …) and the second reason is that thinking and writing about TTC and babies and whatever just makes me bummed out because it isn’t happening for us the way I had hoped it would.

To help remedy the situation (and hopefully bring some baby dust our way), I have made an appointment with an OB/GYN - she even specializes in infertility (although we don’t really know if that’s necessary yet). If I have any luck at all, she will be very proactive about things - I would love it if she would prescribe something to help speed the process up. I’m very hopeful that this doctor will be able to give me some answers (and good news) so that I can stop worrying that something is terribly wrong and it’s never going to happen for us … ugh, it kills me.

And as if all of that nothing going on isn’t enough to drive me insane, I just found out that my cousin who has a 6 month old baby is pregnant again (isn’t she just a fertile Myrtle), a girl I used to work with (who got married 2 weeks before us) is pregnant, we went to my BFF’s baby shower last weekend, and we saw “What to Expect.” Oh, and I see my pregnant boss every single day. It fucking sucks. As excited as I am for all of these people (and as much as I enjoyed “What to Expect” - according to B, I am totally, 100% going to be like Elizabeth Banks’ character), I just can’t help but wonder when it’s going to be my turn. And as I wait for my appointment on June 5th, I’m trying to stay positive … but it doesn’t make talking or blogging about these things any easier. I hope that changes soon.