30 October 2013

Dear Life, Thanks for the Lemons

{Peej - if you're reading this, I need you to promise me - cross your heart - that you won't relay this information to anyone else.  I'm trying to keep things to a more select audience.  Get it?  Thanks for being my favorite!}

This Monday, we had our treatment plan consultation - finally.  And as with any appointment, there was some good news and more than enough bad news, because apparently the universe didn't hear me when I said I needed a win.

The good news was that my egg quality and quantity are good, so aside from the PCOS, I'm pretty okay.  The RE said that trying a higher dose of Letrozole would be a good option for me - maybe I'll actually produce some good follicles.  The bad news is that they saw some issues with B's swimmers, so we're both dealing with our bodies working against us.  The RE then laid out our options - the least aggressive (and least expensive) option is to try IUI, and of course our only other option is the dreaded IVF.  The look on B's face when the RE explained our options broke my heart - it was just so obvious that he was so disappointed.  I couldn't blame him, either.  It's just so unfair.

After we talked to the RE, the financial coordinator came in to give us information sheets about both procedures and explained how the costs would break down with our insurance.  It was pretty much common sense - going with an IUI (or several) would be the least expensive option, and IVF would eat up most of our $15,000 lifetime infertility coverage.  Going with IVF would really limit us - as in, if we tried it once and it failed, we wouldn't be able to try again for years.  We can't afford to spend thousands of dollars on medication either.  Based on that information, it was pretty clear what our decision was going to be - the best choice for us now is IUI.

Because it took us so long to get all of our preliminary testing done and schedule the treatment plan appointment, we won't be moving forward with anything until I start a new cycle (and who knows when that's going to happen.  I'm going to call around CD30 or so to ask for Provera if I don't start on my own).  Instead of waiting for that cycle to get some labs done, we chose to do them on Monday while we were already at the clinic and had already paid our copay.  B had his first blood draw of this ordeal, and he did really well, and then I had my millionth blood draw of the process as well as a date with the medieval torture device known as the speculum.  Ouch.  Results are already back, and everything came back perfect.  We even got to find out what our blood types are (A+ for me, O- for him).

So now we have a plan, and all we have to do is sit back and wait to try it out, and try not to go too crazy in the meantime.  Easier said than done, because it feels like we have so much working against us.  I came across this quote the other day while I was stalking some new blogs, and I had to steal it - it perfectly expresses what it's like to deal with infertility in general, and it was especially timely given some recent personal news.  Maybe the universe needs a hearing (or reading) aide - I said I need a WIN.  Like for me, not for other people.  I don't care if it's selfish.

So thanks again for the lemons, Life, but I'm really getting sick of making lemonade.









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