10 November 2013

On My Mind

I've had a few ideas for posts sitting in my drafts folder for more than a week, and I couldn't for the life of me get enough motivation to finish them (probably because most of them don't deserve to be their own post), so instead, I'm just going to smash the short version into one listy post.
  • It's been a full month since I became a full time housewife, and overall I think it's going pretty well.  Money is pretty tight, but we've been working on adjusting our budget by shopping grocery sales, cutting cable, and selling some stuff on eBay, and we're getting by with what we have.  I still have phases of "oh f*ck, we're so broke and it's all my fault," but B is the best hubster ever, and he always assures me that we'll be fine and he's okay with me being a housewife as long as I actually get some cleaning done (which I have been.  Every day has a different room or task assigned to it, so it's mostly just maintaining the clean).  He's a keeper.  I'm still in the process of looking for (at least) part time work, but I haven't had any luck so far.
  • It turns out I actually like Twitter.  I had an account a looooong time ago because B said it was the next big thing in social media, but then I barely used it and ended up deleting it when I was going through my "gotta decrease my digital footprint" phase.  I recently created a new Twitter account because I found out that a ton of awesome people who are going through the shit-fest of infertility have created an incredibly supportive community, which was something I was very interested in, considering my real life support group is pretty small.  I recently had to update my "Blogs I Enjoy" list because I have come across so many more amazing blogs via the Twitter, and then those blogs led to more, and now I have a lot of reading to do (not a bad problem to have).
  • In preparation for our next cycle, I've decided to try something that's a bit unconventional (my mom would say "hippie dippie") - guided meditation.  I have the Circle + Bloom programs for PCOS and IVF/IUI, and I've started listening to tracks that aren't specific to any cycle days when I'm having a hard time falling asleep because B is snoring too loudly.  They've been successful in getting me into a more restful and relaxed state, and I'm interested to see how things go when I follow them daily.
  • I'm getting really antsy for our next cycle.  Obviously I'm not looking forward to moving on to more expensive and aggressive treatments, but I'm tired of just waiting.  Hopefully AF will come naturally again.  I gave in and looked up the potential due date if AF comes when expected and our first IUI is successful, which was probably a mistake.  The due date generator guesses that we would probably be having a baby on our 4th anniversary.  Now I really want things to work out, and I'm not looking forward to the disappointment if it isn't successful.
  • I've been an a major music kick lately - all I really want to do when I'm home alone (so, all day) is listen to Pandora.  The downside of this music kick is that I've been listening to some kinda emo music, and the lyrics of the songs make me think about B or about infertility and how much it sucks or about life in general and then I end up crying the entire time because I'm a hormonal freak.  I'm a sucker for punishment, so I've started making a playlist of songs that I'd like to use as lullabyes for future babies (and then I realize that we don't know when or if that will happen and I start crying again.  Ugh).
  • Our front porch reno is coming along quite nicely.  Today, I helped B's dad stain all the trim, then B helped his dad install the rest of the drywall and the doorbell.  Next weekend the plan is to install the trim (except for in the closet) and put the final touches on the drywall so I can paint.  Then we just have to finish off the trim and it's done (hopefully)!  Just in time to host our expected 12 (?  I think?) guests for Thanksgiving.  
  • B bought the Lego Marvel game for the Wii-U yesterday, and I'm addicted.  My favorite character to be is Hulk because all he does is smash the crap out of stuff.  The game is stupid difficult though (or maybe we're the stupid ones).
So that's pretty much all that's going on right now.

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